Breathing Space October 2025

by Dan Comer

7 Ways to Start Setting Work Boundaries

Child welfare is important work, and it can be overwhelming. Emergencies, late-night calls, the immense amount of paperwork, and the emotional weight of families’ struggles can quickly blur the line between work and life. I have been coaching lately with several new workers and was reminded once again how critical it is to be able to set personal boundaries—if you want to be able to do this job for the long term.

Boundaries aren’t about being rigid, selfish, or uncaring; they’re about protecting your well-being so you can keep showing up for children and families with energy and compassion. Here are some suggestions I hope you find useful.

    1. Manage your workday with intention
      • Start and end at consistent times when possible. Emergencies will happen, but don’t let them become your default schedule. Communicate your normal hours with colleagues, families, and providers.
      • Use your calendar aggressively. Block time for paperwork, home visits, and follow-up calls. Treat these blocks like appointments. I also advise people to add 30 minutes to however long you think something will take.
      • Create a closing ritual. Clear your desk, make a short to-do list for tomorrow, then shut down your computer. This signals to your brain that the workday is done.
    2. Handle emergencies without burning out
      • Triage before diving in. Ask: Does this need my response right now, or can it wait until morning? Not every urgent-sounding call is truly an emergency.
      • Share the load. Know your agency’s after-hours coverage system. If you’re not on call, don’t pick up work that belongs to someone else.
      • Have a work go-bag. Keep essentials (charger, snacks, water, notebook) ready for when late-night situations arise. This reduces stress when you do have to respond. And you will appreciate some protein and hydration when you have an extra-long day.
    3. Control communication boundaries
      • Use work phone/email only. Don’t give families your personal number. (You know who you are!)
      • Set communication expectations. Tell families: “I usually respond during business hours, but if there’s an emergency, call the main office/on-call line.”
      • This is a big one: silence notifications after hours. Unless you’re on call, turn off email and work notifications in the evening.
    4. Protect your emotional space
      • Have a decompression routine. Listen to music, call a friend, journal, or take a walk after a hard visit or before heading home. Don’t carry the visit straight into your own living room.
      • Give yourself permission to step away. After a difficult phone call or meeting, take five minutes to breathe, stretch, or refill water before rushing to the next task.
      • Practice compartmentalizing. Remind yourself: I care deeply, but I can’t solve everything today. I’ll pick this up tomorrow.
    5. Build support systems
      • Use supervision as a tool. Bring boundary struggles to your supervisor. Good supervisors want to help you problem-solve, not just review paperwork.
      • Lean on colleagues. Venting for five minutes with a trusted coworker can help release tension and normalize challenges.
      • Identify your personal cheerleaders. Colleagues, friends, or family who remind you that you’re more than your job are vital.
    6. Guard your personal life
      • Plan something small after work. Even just cooking dinner, going for a walk, or watching a favorite show gives you something to look forward to.
      • Take your vacation days. Don’t save them indefinitely—rest is a necessary part of the job.
      • Keep work equipment separate. If possible, store your work bag, laptop, and files in a specific spot at home so they don’t bleed into your living space. Out of sight, out of mind!
    7. Create mantras or reminders
      • “I can’t pour from an empty cup.”
      • “Boundaries are how I stay effective.”
      • “This job is part of my life, not my whole life.”

Post your particular reminder where you can see it all the time. (Tattoo?)

A final note

This is a hard lesson for some: boundaries take practice. Some days you’ll do well, and others you’ll feel pulled in too many directions. That’s normal. What matters is noticing when you’re stretched too thin and gently bringing yourself back. By setting healthy boundaries, you’ll not only preserve your own well-being but also serve families more effectively for the long haul.

Dan

P.S. Let me know your personal boundary-setting strategies so I can pass them along to others!